You’re listening to Wisconsin Public Radio. Coming up next is the three o’clock news with Kristen–Slow Train A’comin’–Duerst.
Booth: Kristen, we’ve got about a minute before air. Can we run through the last sentence of the first report again?
Kristen Duerst: Sure. (clears throat). At the moment it remains uncertain if the Department of Fish and Wildlife will allow the use of dogs for this year’s culling of gray woofs.
Booth: Perfect. And five, four, three, two, one–
Duerst: This is Wisconsin Public Radio. I’m Kris…tennnn….Duerr….ssss…….t. The Department of Fish and Wildlife has proposed a blockingage of allowing dogs to take part in this year’s woofs hunt. Local hunters are against the ban saying that it infringes on their right to allow their dogs to get killed in a completely pointless way. At the moment it remains uncertain if the Department of Fish and Wild Animals will allow the use of dogs for this year’s culling of gray… … … woooves… … …
Duerst: In other local news, a ten-year old baby was found wondering in a supermarket in Milwaukee. The parents of the baby have yet to…be…lo… … …caaa…ted.
Duerst: In national news president Obama has continued his stance that Iran be prevented from continuing with their plans to build a fusion reactor as he fears that they will eventually build new clear weapons. In further national news, in Chicago a homeless man was allegedly denied access to a Loews movie theater when he refused to buy a ticket to get in. National Public Radio will be updating this story as it unfolds. In August of last year Kristen Griest and Shaye Haver became the first two women to graduate from the Army’s Ranger school. As we have been doing for the last several months we’ll be continuing to mention this every two hours for the next ten years. In Flint, Michigan concerns continue about the leaching of lead into the water supply from antiquated pipes. For an update on that we go to Ari Shapiro in Flint.
Ari Shapiro: Kristen, I’m standing with Hattie McPherson, a resident of Flint, in the front yard of her humble yet beautifully kept up home. Hattie, have you seen any attempt on the part of the government to remove the lead pipes that are causing the problem?
McPherson: Oh, yeah, I saw one house being worked on today.
Shapiro: One…just one.
McPherson: How many do expect me to see from my kitchen window?
Shapiro: Hattie, one can’t help but notice that Flint is predominantly made up of people of color, such as yourself. There is indeed a large African-American presence here. Many people are saying that the reason the water situation has not been acted on more quickly is because most of the residents are African-American.
McPherson: Oh. No, I don’t think that’s true.
Shapiro: Perhaps you’re unable to see it, being insulated from the true reality, through no fault of your own. But certainly this is obvious to much of America, as it is me, a caring, though privileged white person, and a Yale graduate, who only wants to help you and the African-American community defend yourself against the rampant racism that is a bulwark of American society. Which I detest. And which is the reason I’m here.
McPherson: Because like the epiphytics we need feedin’ and carin’ and cultivatin’? Is that what you were going to say next?
McPherson: Back to you, Kristen.
Duerst: Marco Rubio has suspended his campaign for president following his primary defeat in Florida where his parents didn’t even support him. For an update we go live to Rachel Martin who has Rubio campaign manager Terry Sullivan with her.
Rachel Martin: Terry, Marco Rubio has just suspended his campaign following the defeat in his home state of Florida. What’s the feeling coming from his supporters right now?
Sullivan: I don’t think I could improve on what we just heard Marco Rubio say to his supporters about the effort—
Martin: Terry, the Chicago Cubs came close to going to the World Series last year. What do you think their chances are for this upcoming season?
Sullivan: Well, I don’t know how that’s relevant, but with Anthony Rizzo at first base and the pitching staff—
Martin: I’m sorry, Terry, we’re just about out of time and I decided I’m not really that interested, so back to you, Kristen.
Duerst: That’s the news for this hour. Stay tuned for All Things Considered next as Ari Shapirio continues his twelve-part series on the difficulties and challenges faced by African-American men playing in the NBA. Then at five Jim Hedge will be taking a closer look at the uphill battles faced by people dealing with Chronic Bad Decision Disorder, or CBDD. And at seven on Fresh Air Terri Gross interviews Valerie Sorbin who turned her life around by going from being a meth addict to being on the New York Time’s best seller list with her memoir “All the Weird Things I Did When I Was a Meth Addict.” That’s at…seven. Also stay tuned in at eight o’clock for a special non-biased and objective discussion about the federal government’s continued stance of not granting citizenship to illegal aliens. The hour will feature arguments in favor of maintaining that stance, as well as personal interviews with six illegal aliens who argue in favor of being granted citizenship while Samuel Barber’s Adagio for Strings plays in the background behind them. And tomorrow morning, tune in to Morning Edition as we continue interviewing every person in France about the Paris shootings and asking them how they feel. That series will continue until something really bad happens somewhere else at which time we’ll drop it like a hot potato and pretend it never happened. For me, this is my last day at Wisconsin Public Radio as I’m moving on to other things. It’s been a great pleasure working here, and to all the listeners over the last several years, I just want to say thank you. Good luck to everyone and goodnight. I’m Kirsten Dunst.
Booth: Kristen Duerst.
Duerst: (pause) That’s what I said.
Booth: No, you said you were Kirsten Dunst.
Duerst: Who’s that?
Booth: Somebody else!
(Good luck, Kristen! Wherever you are!)
2 thoughts on “Now The News On WPR”
Osmander….fernroot…..another excellent column, sir!